50 harvard essays part 2 - pdf 21

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as a scholar, as a contributor to my community, and as a member of a family.
But neither my family nor my extended family nor my teachers could comprise my
entire identity. Rather, I will remain like the first page of a book with the first line
incomplete – a story waiting to be told.




ANALYSIS
Levey’s essay is very much a self-exploration of being an intellect. Her idea of
emphasizing her love of learning is solid and she clearly has a sophisticated grasp of
prose, but the overall package might have done better with a little more understated
elegance. The introduction is intriguing with the use of an unobvious historical fact
about customs in the Middle Ages. She successfully introduces herself and her
perception of her role in the world. The first two paragraphs are an easy read,
except that the use of too many polysyllabic adjectives can become a little bit
distracting. Personal essays that are “show me rather than tell me” tend to be more
convincing. What mental gymnastics has she experienced before? W here has
she really pushed for self-growth? The section which describes college as “the next
stop on my journey for self-enlightenment” and “the crescendo of my intellectual
revolution catalyzed by professors who can awaken my mind, ignite my senses, and
alter my perception of the world” is a little bi



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