Truyện cười bằng tiếng anh -2 Boss A man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a parrot. The
shop owner pointed out three identical parrots on a perch
and said, "The parrot to the left costs 500 dollars."
"Why does that parrot cost so much?" the man wondered.

The owner replied, "Well, it knows how to use a computer."

The man asked about the next parrot on the perch.

"That one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the other parrot
can do, plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system." Naturally, the
startled customer asked about the third parrot.

"That one costs 2,000 dollars."

"And what does that one do?" the man asked.

The owner replied, "To be honest, I've never seen him do a thing, but the
other two call him boss!"

Sunday, I had a near death experience that has
changed me forever.
I went horseback riding. Everything was going fine
until the horse starts bouncing out of control. I tried
with all my might to hang on, but was thrown off. Just
when things could not possibly get worse, my foot gets caught in the stirrup.
When this happened, I fell head first to the ground. My head continued to
bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down.

Just as I was giving up hope and losing consciousness the Walmart manager
came and unplugged it.

Thank G-d for Real Heros!
Thank you for flying Dufus Air These are actual (or reported) humorous statements
by airline flight crew members. And if they didn't
say these, I'm sure they thought them really loudly.
"As we prepare for takeoff, please make sure your tray
tables and seat backs are fully upright in their most uncomfortable

is equipped with a video surveillance system that monitors the cabin during
taxiing. Any passengers not remaining in their seats until the aircraft comes
to a full and complete stop at the gate will be strip-searched as they leave the
aircraft."

Here are a few heard from Northwest: "Should the cabin lose pressure,
oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over
your own mouth and nose before assisting children or adults acting like
children."

"As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather all of your belongings.
Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants.
Please do not leave children or spouses."

And from the pilot during his welcome message: "We are pleased to have
some of the best flight attendants in the industry Unfortunately none of
them are on this flight."

Upon landing hard, one pilot got on the PA system and said, "Sorry for the
hard landing, folks. It wasn't the pilot's fault, and it wasn't the plane's fault. It
was the asphalt."