Running head: REFUSING AN OFFER IN ENGLISH AND VIETNAMESE

Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

A Contrastive Analysis

Nguyen Thi My Ngan
HCMC University of Education

Contrastive Analysis Course 2010
Instructor: Nguyen Ngoc Vu
December, 2010


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Abstract
It’s really difficult to refuse someone when he or she offers you
something or to do something, especially when you’re busy or you don’t
want to do. You want to refuse but you don’t know how to say let your
friends or your listeners feel satisfied and contented. Or when your boss
offers you a promotion but you feel you have no ability, how can you
refuse? I hope this paper will help students understand the differences of
refusing an offer in Vietnamese and English to become more proficient in
their studying of English.
Based on literary works either published or uploaded in the internet
and English speaking materials written by native speakers, this paper
studies refusals of offers to enhance the efficiency of the teaching and
learning of this speech act in English and Vietnamese, create the

Refusal is characterized as a response to one of the speech acts,
request, invitation, offer and suggestion, rather than as an initiating act. It is
a speech by which a speaker denies to engage in an action proposed by
the interlocutor (Chen, Ye and Zhang, 1995)
The speech act of refusal occurs when a speaker directly or
indirectly say no to a request or invitation. Refusal is a face-threatening act
to listener/requestor, inviter, because it contradicts his or her expectations,
and it often realized through indirect strategies. Thus it requires a high
level of pragmatic competence (Chen, 1996).
Until now, there have been some works studying about refusals.
Nguyen Phuong Chi studied some ways of refusals: nonverbal like shaking
the head, brushing something aside, having a dirty look… and verbal.
Pham Thi Van Quyen studied the refusals of requesting in Vietnamese in
comparison with English basing on some available situations. Nguyen Thi
Hai studied the refusals in conversations with actions “request”, “ask,
“beg”, “advice”, “invite”, “ thank”, “ compliment”, “ congratulate” …in
Vietnamese.
In this paper, I will give some examples of the English and
Vietnamese refusals of offers in different situations. In the whole paper, I
just focus on verbal refusing an offer. I include three types of offer refusals:
direct, indirect, both direct and indirect. Then I show some similarities as
well as differences in refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese. The final
part of the paper, I will explain the pedagogical implications of this functionrefusing an offer.


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Refusing an offer


Situation 3: You come to visit your friend’s house. Your friend
offers you some cakes that you don’t want to eat. How can you refuse
her?
Situation 4: You have just moved to a new flat several days. You
have difficulty in unlocking the door. Your neighbor offers to help you.
You don’t want, how can you refuse?
After each example in one language, I use the parentheses to
explain the equivalent structures in another language.
1) Refusing an offer directly
According to conversation theory, speech act was made appropriate
to termination of their own speech is direct speech act.

Consider the

following examples to see the differences between two languages easily.
Some examples in Vietnamese refusals:
[1] Thôi. Chuyện của mình thì tự giải quyết đi. Tôi không
có rảnh rang. ( No. You should solve your problem by yourself. I’m not
free)1 (situation 1)
[ 2] “ Thôi. Về đi. Xe của tôi chứ có phải xe của Bình
đâu?.” ( No. Go away. It’s my bike, not your bike, ok?) (situation
2)
[3] Bánh này dở lắm. Không ăn đâu. ( This cake is bad. I
don’t want to eat). (situation 3)
[4] Thôi khỏi. Tôi không cần anh giúp. ( No. I don’t need
your help. (situation 4)
Some examples of English:
[5] I can’t help you. Don’t bother me. ( tôi không giúp anh/
chị đâu. Đừng làm phiền tôi(situation 1)

[13] No, it’s alright. I can manage. ( Không, được rồi. Mình
có thể tự xoay sở.) (situation 2)
[14] No, Thank you. ( Không, cảm ơn) (situation 3)
Moreover, unlike native speakers of English, Vietnamese
sometimes likes to use proverbs of philosophy in human life when
they refuse directly:
Ex: Không cần anh giúp đâu. Đèn nhà ai nấy sáng đi ( I
don’t need your help. Half the world not knows how the other half
lives). (situation 4)


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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2) Refusing an offer indirectly:
Here are some responses to three situations indirectly in
Vietnamese and English:
In Vietnamese, we have some examples:
[15] Phương à, thât sự xin lỗi. Dạo này tôi bận tập trung
vào kế hoạch kinh doanh mới, sợ là tới hết năm nay cũng chưa
hết bận nữa. David rất nhiệt tình, hay anh/ chị thử nhờ anh ấy
xem. (I’m really sorry, Phuong. This time, I’m really busy to
concentrate on my new project.I’m afraid I’m going to be busy
until the end of the year. David is really ethusiatic, You can ask
him to help you). (situation 1)
[16] Cảm ơn Binh, mình dắt bộ được mà. …với lại đoạn
này chẳng có tiệm sửa xe đâu. ( Thanks Binh, I can walk to take
it. Moreover, there is no bike repair shop). (situation 2)
[17] Cảm ơn bạn. Tôi ăn chưa quen loại bánh này.

popular phenomenon to every society, every aspect of interaction. Without
politeness, life loses the good relationship between human to each other.
Politeness is a culture issue which has the features of each community.
Every

society, every country has its own politeness principles. However,

evaluating which statement is true, how to speak politely, which level is
formal is regulated by each specific culture.
In reality, sometimes we can achieve the effect by using this speech
act instead of using other speech act. This is an indirect speech act.
Indirect speech act strategies based on ability to express something
indirectly and its contents are shown by the definition “Direct speech act”
(Searle, 1975). By refusing “No, I don’t want to lend you my money”,
informant can say “Sorry, My mum hasn’t sent my money yet” to inform
that he doesn’t want to help his partner.
There are many opinions in the use of direct or indirect speech act.
Some authors say that brief and condensed way of indirect speaking will
help to express the own personality of the speakers. Moreover, it’s perhaps
more politely than direct way of speaking. Consider two examples to
realize the politeness in these utterances:


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Khuong anh Thao( 2004) says that most of surveyed examples in
Vietnamese start with “gratitude” and give the explanations for their
refusals or otherwise. While English sentences often start with phrases

10

[26] Cảm ơn bạn. Thật sự mình chưa quen ăn loại bánh
này. Với lại mình còn no lắm. Mình không ăn nữa đâu. Lần sau
nhất định mình sẽ ăn thử. ( thanks. I’m not familiar with this kind
of cake. I’m still full. I can’t eat more. I’ll try next time). (situation
3)
[27] Cái cửa này hôm qua em mở được. Chắc hôm nay sẽ
mở được. Anh khỏi giúp em đi. Không sao đâu. Có gì em gọi anh
sau. Thôi cũng trễ rồi, anh về phòng ngủ đi. Chúc anh ngủ ngon.
( I can open it yesterday. Today I can open. You don’t need to
help me. Don’t worry for me. I will call up you later.. It’s too late,
you should return your room. Good night.). ( situation 4).
In English:
[28] In fact, I’d like to help you, but I’m really busy in my
new project. Sorry. I can’t help you. I think David can help you.
( Tôi rất muốn giúp anh/chị nhưng tôi bận làm kế hoạch mới rồi.
Xin lỗi, tôi không giúp anh/chị được.

Tôi nghĩ David giúp anh/

chị được đó) (situation 1)
[29] No, thanks. It’s too late now, you should go home. I
really appreciate your concern but I can solve it by myself. See
you later. ( thôi cảm ơn bạn. trễ rồi bạn về đi. Cảm ơn bạn đã
quan tâm nhưng mình tư giải quyết được). (Situation 2)
[30] Thanks. It looks delicious but I’m really full so I’ll have
to pass it. ( Cảm on nhé. Nhìn ngon quá nhưng mình no quá rồi.
đành bỏ qua nó thôi.). (Situation 3)
[31] You’re so kind but I’m familiar with it. You don’t need to


Thanking
Thanks,
thank you,
thanks ever so much

Table 3:
appreciation
I’d like to help you

reasons
Excuses/apology
But I’m too busy to help Sorry ( situation 1).
you

In Vietnamese:
Table 3:


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Negative word
Thôi

Thanking
Cảm ơn

Không

Reasons/

explaining

why

accepting
Thanks.

I can manage it.

Thank you.

But I can do it by myself.

Thank you very much.

But I’m really full.

Table 6

not


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese
Positive appreciation

13

Reasons/ explaining

But I’m really full. I’ll try it next time.( situation 2)

Oh, What a pity!

I wish I didn’t eat anything before I come here.
( situation 2)

Table 8:
Calming words

Reasons/

explaining

why

Don’t worry

accepting
It’s better now. ok ( Situation 1)

Never mind

Let me try. (Situation 4).

not

And some here are the structures of some sentences of refusing an
offer in Vietnamese:
Table 9:


Table 10:
The sympathies with the
interlocutor
Cũng trễ lắm rồi, Bình về trước đi

Bạn làm gì đủ sức mà mở

The replacing actions
Để mình dắt được mà. ( situation 2).

Để đó đi. ( situation 4)

Table 11:
Thanking words
Cảm ơn

Philosophy of human life.
Nhưng “đèn nhà ai nấy sáng” đi
anh ạ . ( situation 4)
Nhưng “đèn nhà ai nấy sáng” Bình
à. ( situation 2)

Table 12:
The person who refuses gives the Reasons/
anxiety/ worry
Mình chỉ sợ

explaining


term

promise

asking

words

for

information

See example 24 above.
Table 14:
Negative
words/phrases
No
No

Thanking
words
Thanks
Thanks

Reasons/

explaining

why not accepting
But I can manage


Promise/advise

See example 28 above.
Table 17
Negative
words/phrases
Thôi được rồi

Thanking words
Cảm ơn Bình

Reasons/

explaining

why not accepting
Mình tự dắt bộ
xe được rồi.

Table 18:
Thanking words
Cảm ơn bạn
Cảm ơn anh

Reasons/

explaining Promising/ wishing

why not accepting

Vietnamese and English both employ the directness types. The first
one is direct refusal such as “No way, no thanks”…in English, “thôi, khỏi…”
in Vietnamese. The next is ability of negation speech act which means the
speaker doesn’t have ability to accept the offer. These speech acts can be
“I can’t” in English, “tôi không thể giúp anh”..in Vietnamese. The third is
indirect speech act which means refusal is performed through the other
speech such as “I’m really busy this week” in English or “tôi có thể tự mở
nó được” in Vietnamese (situation 4).
Both English and Vietnamese refuse an offer by giving the reasons
why not accepting or offering other occasions (see the given examples
above)
Politeness is the norm that people of different culture backgrounds
must obey and uphold because to satisfy other’s face is to save your own
face. Therefore, both Vietnamese and English prefer to the indirect refusal
speech act in offer than the direct refusal speech act. Using direct or
indirect speech act in life of Vietnamese and English both depends on
many factors: age, gender, relationship, social status…

Some main differences between Vietnamese and English in
refusing an offer
Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese mainly differ in
practical strategies of word use and syntactic structure.


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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About intercultural verbal styles, Viet Nam and some other Asian
countries

Làm sao tao giúp mày được trong khi tao cũng đang bận tối mặt tối
mũi. ( situation 1)
I sympathy for your difficult situation but I can’t help you.(situation 1)
I’m too busy to help you. ( Situation 1).
Additionally, according to Khuong and Thao survey (2007)
Vietnamese tend to use model particles such as à, ư, nhỉ, nhé, thôi, nha…
to express the speakers’ nuance.
Cảm ơn Bình nhé nhưng mình tự dắt xe được (situation 2).
In Vietnamese culture, the face of Vietnamese involved the respect
of hierarchy, the status admission of interlocutor. Therefore, politeness
behavour is not only personal politeness strategies but also forcefully is the
clever choice in vocabulary. Some words “dạ, ạ, xin, thưa” often appear in
Vietnamese speech act of refusal when they talk to the older people
(parents, grandparents, teachers…).


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Ex: “ Dạ, em không muốn làm anh đổ mồ hôi vì cánh cửa này đâu”.
(Situation 3)
As I have referred above, Vietnamese often use philosophy of
human life in refusing an offer while English rarely use.
We know that English-speaking countries belong to low-context
communication; the meaning is expressed through explicit verbal
messages to help the listeners understand easily. People’s speech acts are
also embedded in the cultural background. The doctrine of collectivism and
social hierarchy influenced Vietnamese, so people try to be harmonious
and self-restrained in the social communication. English people are

and rhetorical utterances such as “It’s very nice of you”, “It smells
delicious”. Those utterances alleviate the refusal impact. Vietnamese is just
on the opposite. They consider the social order, so the refusal bases on
relationship, social status, age…that result in the speech act of refusing an
offer of Vietnamese is quite different in each situation. That means
directness of the speech act of refusing an offer varies and depends on
whom they speak to in each situation such as friends, parents, lover… For
example, Vietnamese refuse their friends “ tao không ăn đâu”, or refuse
their mother “ con no lắm rồi mẹ ơi” or refuse their lover “ em không ăn nổi
nữa, no lắm rồi”. And therefore, the addressee words also change such as
“tao, em, con…” while English just use “I” or “me”. This contributes to make
Vietnamese have more nuances.
Moreover, according to Dũng’s surveys, In indirect refusal of an offer,
although both English and Vietnamese refuse an offer by giving the
reasons, the reasons of Vietnamese are brief and they don’t attach
anything more. But sometimes, the English try to replace the reasons by
dilemma which make the refusing be softer and the partner doesn’t lose
face or feel hurled or offence. A remarkable point is that the English tend
to attach the regrets of not accepting the offer while Vietnamese are rare to
use them. Consider the following examples:
“Oh,What a pity! I’m really full now. I can’t eat any more.”
I have categorized the forms of refusing an offer in English and
Vietnamese by 18 tables above. Considers these 18 tables we can see the
syntactic structure of some sentences of refusing an offer in English is


Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Refusing an offer in English and Vietnamese

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Therefore, in learning language, we consider the different languages
not to base on whether these languages can express what kinds of
meanings, but we consider them base on whether some expressed
languages are forced to have some meanings which other languages don’t
need to express without necessity.

IV) Pedagogical implications:
Learning language is a form of activity that involves many of the
cultural and social factors. When the learners practices communication in
new language, the habits in culture become the second characteristics that
can become advantages or disadvantages in their learning and practicing
communication. Vietnamese learners of English have difficulty not only in
the differences in language and non-language factors but also in language
style, approach strategies…In this paper, we refer to “refusing an offer”,
one of the functions of English. Therefore, besides the language
competence and the knowledge about culture of country, the teachers of
language need the knowledge about the communicative style or the culture
of the learners. This helps the teachers understand the difficulties of the
learners and adjust the appropriate methods, techniques of teaching to
create the connection between the learning and teaching.
In fact, the differences in language of communicative behaviors can
cause cultural interferences that have negative influences on the teaching
and learning task. Therefore, foreign language teachers should be aware
of these distinctive features to help learners overcome the psychological
and cultural barriers in the teaching and learning process.
Teacher need to make students be aware of specific speech acts

conversation that no one can predict. Teacher should also try to provide
students with some of the common patterns that English speakers use
everyday and also help students to build their vocabulary to include these
patterns and phrases. The teacher also shows functional connection
between refusals and offers and explains to students some useful phrases
of refusing an offer that are often used. Moreover, we should instruct
students when to use three types of refusing an offer appropriately in each
situation.


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Secondly, teacher should draw students’ attention to politeness and
rudeness of refusing an offer and encourage students employ the
politeness strategies if they want to achieve the success in communication.
This helps improve students’ language competence.
Last but not least, teacher can design many tasks which provide
students with opportunities to practice them in short exchanges, dialogs
and conversations or teacher can conduct some activities like role play that
make students use the patterns of refusing an offer and helps them
remember these pattern longer. From these activities students not only
practice the patterns, but also practice pronunciation, vocabulary and how
to respond correctly in conversation because “Experience is the best
teacher.” (Trăm hay không bằng tay quen), practice makes perfect.
Moreover, if students are given many chances to speak and are
encouraged frequently, they’ll be more confident to speak the second
language in many situations like their mother tongue. Then they relate the
English refusals in the situations to Vietnamese ones to see the similarities