THANH HOA DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION AND TRAINING

THIEU HOA HIGH SCHOOL

EXPERIENCE INITIATIVE

HOW TO USE “PEER FEEDBACK” EFFECTIVELY TO
IMPROVE WRITING SKILL FOR 10TH GRADERS AT THIEU
HOA HIGH SCHOOL

The author: Trinh Thi Loan
Job position: Teacher
Subject: English

THANH HOÁ – 2019

1


I. INTRODUCTION
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1. Rationale for the study
Writing is wildly viewed as a process and it requires contributions of time
from teachers and students in order for it to achieve satisfactory results. These
days, there have been a lot of techniques recommended to boost students’
writing competence. From my teaching experience, I am convinced that giving
writing feedback is of great importance because feedback is considered an
indispensable component of instructing and learning process, the
implementation of effective feedback, therefore, plays a key role in improving

- Help students to enable to find the mistakes in the writing papers and correct
them quickly and effectively.
2.2. For the teachers
- Find out the most effective methods to improve students’ writing skill in
general and the method of applying peer feedback in detail.
- Know how to stimulate students to improve their writing skills.
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3. Research methodology
I write this topic based on:
- The method of studying theory.
- The method of investigating.
- Applying the topic to real teaching English at Thieu Hoa high school.
- Comparison, collation and summary of the result, effect of the topic.
4. Scope of research
The scope of this study is limited to “peer feedback” carried out in writing
lessons in English 10 at high school. It explores the strengths and limitation of
peer feedback in teaching and learning writing skill, the real situation of giving
written corrective peer feedback at my school and how to make use of peer
feedback to improve writing skill for 10th graders.
II. PROBLEM SOLVING
1. Theoretical background and practical background
1. 1. Theoretical background
Writing, unlike speaking, is not an ability we acquire naturally, even in
our first language - it has to be taught. Writing is a system for interpersonal
communication using various styles of language (Jalaludin, 2011). It plays a
fundamental role in our personal and professional lives. In academia, writing has
become central as a measure for academic success.
Giving feedback in writing is an activity after students have written a

II. Pre – writing. (12 minutes)
Prewriting is the preparation the teacher and students do before students
begin to draft the paper. In this stage, vocabulary is taught and structure or
format is prsented. Usually, some tasks designed in the textbook are carried out.
III. While – writing. (13minutes)
Students begin to put the paper in paragraph form. They may write their
papers individually, in pairs or in groups. Teachers observe and help.
IV. Post – Writing.( 10 minutes )
Teacher gives feedback. The more time the teacher has, the more papers
he / she gives feedback to.
V. Homework. (5 minutes)
Here are the results after students in class in 10 th form (10B) when they
were required to write a paragraph (100 words) about their daily activities when
the teacher follows the traditional writing lesson plans. This test was done at the
beginning of the school year.
Class Number of students 8.0 – 10.0
6.5 - 7.0
5.0 – 6.0

feedback is often most helpful to student writers when it is utilized between the
drafting and revision stages, or after each student has produced a complete draft,
but while there is still time to make substantial changes. A writer might learn
from peer-feedbackers. The purpose of peer feedback as a prelude to revision is
to help the writer determine which parts of the paper are effective, and which are
unclear, incomplete, or unconvincing.
Lastly, I described peer feedback as an opportunity for students to learn
how to write for an authentic audience and defined the role of the peer
feedbacker as that of a reader, not an evaluator. Participating in peer feedback
can help them learn to shape their written language as a medium of
communication with readers.
2.3 Procedures of conducting peer feedback in the study.
2.3.1. Preparations
2.3.1. 1. Determining how peer feedback would fit into the course.
Before applying feedback to writing lessons, I decided in which writing
lessons in the course would include a peer-feedback session. I gave the time that
was required to conduct peer-feedback sessions successfully, in Tieng Anh 10,
peer feedback would work best in about 10 minutes. Then I decided when peerfeedback sessions would occur. The ideal time for peer feedback is after students
have written a complete draft of a paper, but while there is still time for
substantial revision. I looked over my course schedule, made time for a “mock”
peer-feedback session before I asked students to feedback one another’s writing,
so that they could learn to identify and began practicing the skills necessary for
peer feedback.
2.3.1. 2. Designing peer-feedback worksheets for peer-feedback session.
These worksheets (Peer Feedback Worksheet) should include specific tasks that
are suitable for students’ levels and feedbackers can complete during the session.
I often provide students guiding questions or checklists to use when they
evaluate their peers’ written work. Besides, I often demonstrate to students what
to focus on and how to communicate about their peers’ written papers.
Here is an example of a set of guiding question I used for peer feedback in the

grade students’ contributions to peer-feedback sessions.
I assigned a point-value to different aspects of the work required for peer
feedback. The following example illustrates a point-system approach to grading
student performance in peer feedback:
Brought 2 copies of paper to class: 5 pts
Provided peers with specific, constructive written feedback: 0-5 pts
Participated actively in discussion of each paper: 0-5 pts
Wrote specific response to peers’ feedback: 0-5 pts
Total score for each peer-feedback session: 0-20 pts.
2. 3.2. Before the Peer-Feedback Session
2.3.2.1. Demonstrating a “mock” peer-feedback session.
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First, I copied and distributed a brief sample paper submitted by a student
in an earlier semester .The chosen paper is typical of students in grade 10. Next,
ask students to take 2minutes to read the paper and 5 minutes to write some
comments, using a peer-feedback worksheet. If time allows, you can ask
students to work in groups of 3-4 to produce written comments; if you do so,
give them an additional 4-6 minutes for group discussion.
After students have produced written comments individually or as a
group, use a document camera or overhead projector to show some feedbacking
comments to the class. When necessary, follow-up with questions that help the
students phrase their comments in more specific and constructive ways. For
example, if a student comments, “I like the first paragraph,” you might ask, “can
you tell the writer what you find effective or appealing about that paragraph?
And why?” Your aim should be to help students understand that the point of
their comments should be to describe their experience as readers with specific
language, not to praise or condemn their peers or to tell the peer how they would
write the paper.


feedback to a writer when that writer is a friend. Moreover, assigning students to
the groups will allow the instructor to ensure that the groups are heterogeneous
in terms of, for example, student ability, gender, race, and academic major. Such
heterogeneity can enhance student learning in groups. When the time is limited,
the teacher should ask students to work in pairs.
Maintaining the pairs or groups throughout the semester will help your
students build the trust that is necessary for peer feedback to be successful. You
should encourage your students to speak with you if they find that their peerfeedback groups are not functioning as well as desired, but you should also
make it clear that you are interested in helping them find ways to work together
to solve whatever problems have surfaced.
2.3.3. During Peer-Feedback Sessions
2.3.3.1. Structuring each peer-feedback session with clear instructions and
time limits.
To start each session, distribute peer-feedback worksheets (see above),
explain how students should complete the worksheets, set time limits, and ask
each group to designate one person as a time-keeper to make sure that the group
stays on schedule. Peer-feedback sessions can be accomplished in 10-15
minutes. If instructors find that more time is preferable, consider asking students
to read their peers’ papers before coming to class (This is for giving peer
feedback on homework).
The following is a peer-feedback schedule that can work in a 45minute class. When writing papers in Tieng Anh 10 are around 100- 200 words
long, peer-feedbackers should spend about 10-15 minutes reading and
feedbacking each paper: 5 minutes reading the paper (tell students to read each
paper twice) and 5-10 minutes writing comments.
After all 3 students (or 2 students) have finished commenting on the
papers submitted by their peers, the group (the pairs) should then devote 2
minutes to a “discussion” of each paper. During this discussion, the 2
feedbackers should present spoken feedback to the writer. If feedbackers feel
uncomfortable with providing spoken feedback, they might start by reading their

success of the peer-feedback sessions and to determine what you might do to
improve them.
- Are students writing thoughtful comments that provide an adequate
amount of detail? If not, spend some time in class before the next peer-feedback
session giving students suggestions for how to phrase comments in a specific,
constructive way.
- Are students using the peer-feedback worksheets to develop thoughtful
responses to peer comments?
- Are they coming up with plans for revision that take into account at least
some of their peers’ comments?
Around midterm, I asked students to complete anonymous evaluation
forms that include questions such as, “What is the most important insight that I
have learned as a result of the peer-feedback process?” and “What can be done
(by the instructor or by students, or both) to make the peer-feedback sessions run
more smoothly?”Be prepared to hear that the peer-feedback sessions are not
functioning as well as you believe they are, and be open to making changes that
incorporate your students’ observations and ideas. In other words, model the
same open-mindedness to revision that you want them to display as writers
during peer feedback.
In conclusion, the procedures of my applying peer feedback can briefly be
listed as following:
Step 1: Introduce the technique “peer feedback” to students and
emphasize the need to use it in writing process.
Step 2: Demonstrate examples of student writing and appropriate and
inappropriate peer feedback responses. Have students engage in providing peer
feedback with it.
Step 3: Provide students a handout that contains peer feedback guidelines
and a set of useful phrases for responding appropriately to classmates’ texts.(see
appendix 3)
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comment their partner’s writing)
- Rewriting: 6 minutes
III. Post writing: Teacher feedback. (showing 2 examples) – 5 minutes.
IV. Homework: 2 minutes
2.4.2. Example of the application of peer feedback in English textbook 10
2.4.2.1. UNIT 1. A DAY IN THE LIFE OF………….
Writing a narrative
A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to:
1. Language skills:
- use key terms and key grammatical structures related to a hotel fire to write a
narrative about a hotel fire they know.
- use the past simple and past continuous tense to write a narrative
- develop writing and collaboration skills.
2. Educational purposes:
- Understand values of life after having frightening experience.
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- Be proud of themselves as they can work together to write an interesting
narrative.
B. PROCEDURES.
I. BEFORE WRITING
- Ask students to look up new vocabulary in the textbook, do Task 1 and Task 2,
Task 3 at home as homework. (They can do this well because they have books,
dictionaries and the internet)
- The teacher quickly gives feedback to what the students have done at home
and elicits the format of a story from the students.
II. WHILE WRITING
Controlled writing (8 minutes – They can do this task quickly because they have
prepared at home)

I. BEFORE WRITING:
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Ask students to look up new vocabulary in the textbook, do Task 1 and Task 2 at
home as homework. (They can do this well because they have books ,
dictionaries and the internet )
The teacher quickly gives a model of Newton’s Background and elicits the
format of a background from the students.
II. WHILE WRITING
1. Controlled writing (8 minutes – They can do this task quickly because they
have prepared at home)
- Task 1. Read Mr. Brown’s CV and write a paragraph about his background ,
using the cues given.
- The teacher gives feedback, students exchange their papers to comment
2. Free writing. Write about your partner’s parents.
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft (10 minutes)
Peer feedback (6 minutes)
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback
from their partner (6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader:……………………………………………………
Does the paper present key facts and events in his / her life such as date of birth,
place of birth, school attended, exam passed and interests?
Is the past simple tense used for past events?
Is the present simple tense used for present facts?
Does the writer use correct form to write about above facts and events?
Does the paper provide insight into the person’s character?

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

The teacher introduces the situation in task 1 and ask students to do task 2.
(They can do this task quickly because they have prepared at home )
- The teacher gives feedback , students exchange their papers to comment
2.Free writing .
Imagine you saw an English centre’s advertisement in the newspaper. You decided
to study there . After 5 days studying there , you realised that some things are worse
than what the advertisement says. Write a letter of complaint
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft ( 10 minutes )
Peer feedback ( 6 minutes )
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback from
their partner ( 6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader:……………………………………………………
Do the opening and closing have any errors in capitalization and punctuation ? If so ,
how can they be improved ?
Is it easy to see what the letter is about ?
Are ideas expressed in a clear and organized fashion ?
Are all sentences complete and well-constructed (no fragments, no run-ons) ?


Students work individually to write the first draft (10 minutes)
Peer feedback (6 minutes)
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback
from their partner (6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader: ……………………………………………………
Is the present simple tense correctly used for present facts?
Does the writer make any errors in capitalization and punctuation?
Is the writing free of misspellings?
Is the writing free of fragments and run-ons?
Does the description present a clear and complete picture with all the facts and
information from the table?
Are the details sufficient and appropriate?
Are the details presented in a recognizable and appropriate order?
Are transition words used effectively?
Is the paper neat, legible, and presented in an appropriate format?
Does the writing cover all the information in the table?
POST WRITING (5 minutes)
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 letters as examples
HOMEWORK (2 minutes)
2.4.2.5
UNIT 12
WRITING ABOUT A FAMOUS MUSICIAN

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A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to write about a
famous musician’s life and career.



2
3
4
5
6
7
8
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date of birth ,place of birth,school attended , exam passed and
interests ?
Is the past simple tense used for past events ?
Is the present simple tense used for present facts ?
Does the writer use correct form to write about above facts and
events ?
Does the writer supply strong description of events ?
Does the writer makes any errors in capitalization and
punctuation ?
Is the background presented in a logical and organized way ?
Does the paper provide insight into the person’s character?
Does the writer paint a vivid portrait using anecdote and quotes ?
POST WRITING ( 5 minutes )
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 letters as examples
HOMEWORK ( 2 minutes )

3. The result of the study
In writing lessons for the last school year, I have collected all the students’
first drafts (the ones they wrote before receiving peer feedback) and all the

3 (25,5%)
The results of written essays proved that after involvement in peer feedback
learning, It definitely boost the quality of writing regarding to mark below 5
and from 6.5 to 7. The English learners had become able to write better in terms
of grammar accuracies, complex structures, a wide range of vocabularies and
punctuation that items peer feedback concentrate on. It was, therefore,
concluded that peer feedback learning had helped 10th graders to improve and
develop their writing skills.
From the procedures of applying peer feedback in teaching process, I
clearly see the benefits that students can gain as following:
Firstly, students consider it as an opportunity to learn from peers on
grammar, syntax, vocabulary and learning strategy, and to apply the learned
knowledge into practice.
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Secondly, errors made by peers are warnings against the same repetitions
in their own essays.
Then, by changing the role from a writer to a reader and a reviewer,
personal ideas on a topic can be better communicated, views broadened, writers’
sense of audience enhanced and understanding of the theme deepened, a good
way to develop critical thinking. Finally, during the process, their reading,
writing and communicating skills are advanced.
III. CONCLUSION
1. Conclusion
Writing occupies an important place in learn and teaching English.
Students are required to do a great deal of writing. But, unless they are given
reliable feedback on their writing, the set writing tasks may not help them much
in improving their writing skills. Peer feedback in my class proves has positive
effects on students in writing process in several ways. It improves students self



.
I hereby acknowledge that this study is mine. The date and findings discussed in
the study are true, and not a copy of other’s

The confirmation of the Head –
Master

Thanh Hoa, 25th May 2019
The author

Lê Đăng Điển

Trịnh Thị Loan

REFERENCE
1. English textbook 10, Education and Pulishing House

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2. Brookes and Grundy (2009: 11. Cited in Ghothbene, N. 2010) The Effect of
Teachers’ Written Feedback on Developing the Students’ Written Products Case
Study: Second Year EFL Students at Mohamed Kheider University of Biskra
3. Gielen et al., 2010a: Gielen, S., Peeters, E., Dochy, F., Onghena, P., & Struyven,
K. (2010). Improving the effectiveness of peer feedback for learning
4. Walker (2009). Peer Feedback in Learning English Writing: Advantages and
Disadvantages.Journal of Studies in Education ISSN 2162-6952 2013, Vol. 3,
No. 4

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Writing lesson 1
First
Composition
draft
(after receiving peer
feedback )
4.5
6.0
2.5
4.0

5.0
6.0
5.0
5.5
3.5
4.0
3.0
4.0
3.0
3.5
6.0
7.0
7.0
7.5
2.0
2.5
4.0
5.0
4.0
4.5
3.0
4.5
4.0
5.0
4.0
5.0
3.5
5.0
7.5
8.0

6.0
7.0
7.5
6.5
7.5
6.0
6.5
4.5
5.5
6.5
7.0
3.5
5.0
7.5
8.0
5..0
7.0
4.5
5.5
4.0
4.5
6.5
7.5
6.0
6.5
4.5
5.5
45
6.0
4.0

4.0
6.5
7.0
7.0
7.5
4.0
4.5
5.5
6.5
5.0
5.5
5.0
5.5

Writing lesson 6
First
Composition
draft
(after receiving peer
feedback)
4.5
6.0
5.5
65
5.5
6.5
4.0
5.0
6.0
6.5

4.5
5.0
2.0
4.0
6.0
7.0
6.0
6.5
40
4.5
5.0
6.0
4.5
5.0
5.0
6.0
5.0
6.0
45
6.0
4.5
6.0
5.5
6.0
5.0
6.0
5.5
6.0
6.0
7.0

5 – (12,5 %)
10- (25% )
20 –(50 %0

After
8- (20%)
10-(25%)
12-(30%)
10 -(25%)

Improvement
3 (7,5%)
5 (12,5%)
2 (5%)
3 (25,5%)

APPENDIX 3.

Liu and Hansen List of Useful Sentences for Peer Review Activities
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What ESL students might say

This wrong



How could you say that?





I don’t understand this paper








I don’t like this paper









How could you write this paper
without thesis statement?







understand this paper because…
It seems that you have spent a lot
of time working on this paper, but
could you give us a brief summary of it?
I’m a little confused about the
paper.
I’m not sure I agree with ideas
You put a lot of effort into this
paper, but I feel like I could have
enjoyed it more if I knew what
you intended to say.
Although some points are well
made, I guess your way of
thinking is different from mine.
Can you tell me where your thesis
statement is?
Your thesis statement is not clear to me.
Could you help me locate your
thesis statement in the paper?
Can you use another word here?
You use this word a lot. Maybe
use a different word.
This word/ expression/ sentence is
good here, but its power is
decreased due to overuse.
I like this word/ expression/
sentence, but your paper might be
better with a variety of expressions.
Could you think of another word/
expression/ sentence to enrich the text?

your revision of this paper,
although the basic idea of this paper is there.
Very good. You could…
This is good but if you want you can…
Well done. But this paper could be better if you…
What a good job! If I were you, I would still work
hard to improve…
Nice job. I believe you can still work on…

(From: Liu & Hansen, 2002, pp. 141-142)

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